An Evening Binge of Pulp Heroes: The Shadow, The Rocketeer, Darkman, and The Phantom
So you’re looking for a movie night full of jetpacks, psychic crime-fighters, purple jumpsuits, and an emotionally scarred dude who melts faces? Buckle up, because we’re diving headfirst into a pulp hero binge that’s like raiding a comic shop in 1993 while wearing a trench coat and sunglasses indoors. Let’s break it down.
The Shadow (1994): Who Knows What Evil Lurks in the Hearts of Men? Alec Baldwin Knows
Alec Baldwin stars as Lamont Cranston, a rich guy with psychic powers, a flair for fedoras, and a knack for creeping people out. The Shadow brings you all the brooding mysticism and noir vibes you could want, plus some questionable CGI and a talking dagger that’s way too stabby for its own good.
Johnny Spoiler’s Highlights:
Baldwin whisper-growling, “The Shadow knows,” like he’s auditioning for a Batman reboot.
Shiwan Khan, played by John Lone, whose villainy is so suave it almost makes you root for him to win.
A climax so over-the-top it feels like the set designer dropped acid and said, “Let’s just go for it, man.”
Watch it if you want a moody, campy ride where logic takes a back seat to style. And remember, The Shadow always knows… but never really explains.
The Rocketeer (1991): Jetpacks and Nazis—What’s Not to Love?
Billy Campbell plays Cliff Secord, a stunt pilot who finds a jetpack and does what any of us would do: straps it on without reading the manual. Directed by Joe Johnston (aka the guy who gave us Captain America: The First Avenger), this movie is pure retro fun, with Timothy Dalton playing the most dashing Nazi spy you’ve ever seen.
Johnny Spoiler’s Highlights:
Cliff using the jetpack for the first time and somehow not flying straight into a brick wall.
Dalton’s Neville Sinclair giving us, “What if Errol Flynn was evil and loved goose-stepping?” energy.
Jennifer Connelly’s Jenny Blake, who is too good for Cliff but humors him anyway because it’s the 1930s.
This movie is like a Disneyland ride for your brain: harmless, charming, and makes you want a hot dog afterward.
Darkman (1990): Sam Raimi Goes Full Weird Science Revenge Thriller
Imagine Phantom of the Opera had a baby with Death Wish and then handed it over to Sam Raimi to raise. Liam Neeson stars as Peyton Westlake, a scientist-turned-burn victim who decides the best way to cope is to impersonate bad guys and blow stuff up. It’s dark, it’s bizarre, and it’s proof that Raimi doesn’t know how to make a boring movie.
Johnny Spoiler’s Highlights:
Neeson losing it at a carnival because someone cheats him on a stuffed elephant.
The insane helicopter chase scene that feels like Raimi said, “More explosions. No, more explosions.”
The makeup effects, which are both gross and awesome, like a pizza you’re afraid to eat but can’t stop staring at.
Darkman is what happens when you give a horror director a superhero budget and zero restrictions. It’s messy, glorious, and worth every second.
The Phantom (1996): Purple Spandex, Jungle Fights, and Zero Apologies
Billy Zane stars as Kit Walker, aka The Phantom, a guy who fights evil with the power of really tight pants. Set in the jungles of Bengalla, this movie doesn’t care if you take it seriously—it’s here for fun, treasure hunts, and Treat Williams hamming it up as Xander Drax, a villain whose name sounds like a prescription drug.
Johnny Spoiler’s Highlights:
Zane delivering lines with so much sincerity you forget he’s wearing a onesie.
Xander Drax trying to out-ham every villain in movie history—and succeeding.
The Phantom punching bad guys and sharks. Because why not?
This is the cinematic equivalent of a vintage cereal box: bright, ridiculous, and oddly satisfying. Don’t think too hard—just let the jungle antics wash over you.
The Ultimate Pulp Hero Verdict
Together, these movies are like the Justice League of campy pulp adventures. The Shadow brings the brooding drama, The Rocketeer delivers wholesome Americana, Darkman adds a pinch of unhinged chaos, and The Phantom ties it all together with a purple bow of unapologetic fun.
So grab some popcorn, turn down the lights, and let these heroes transport you to a time when jetpacks, psychic powers, and jungle magic ruled the world. By the end, you’ll either want to fight crime or start wearing capes. Either way, it’s a win.
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