Well, I might look like Kevin, but I think like Dwight. That would make for a great dating profile headline, don’t you think? Anyway, welcome to the Binge-Watchers Podcast, with your host, Johnny Spoiler. Stick around, because after I finish my drink—which is red and delicious (the drink, not an apple)—I’ll be back to spoil a movie for you, with love, of course. Always with love.

Today’s home video headlines: There’s a new vampire movie called OnlyFangs out there, and it had me worried it was too close to my own vampire flick Night Work, but nope, the secret is safe—for now. Also, Camille Mendes has been cast as Teela in the new Masters of the Universe live-action film. They’ve already cast He-Man too, but I can’t recall his name. He’s ripped though—don’t worry, he’s got that classic 80s He-Man vibe, not a dad-bod version.

Speaking of Bubba Ho-Tep, did you know it only has a 79% rating on Rotten Tomatoes? That’s criminal! This movie deserves a binge-now rating. Why? Well, it’s about Elvis, who fakes his own death and ends up in a nursing home where he teams up with a guy claiming to be JFK. Together, they face off against a mummy who’s sucking the souls out of the other residents. It’s directed by the guy behind Phantasm—you know, with the flying metal balls and the Tall Man. It’s a bizarre, hilarious, and oddly touching movie that deserves more than just a “cult classic” label.

Now let’s dive into tonight’s featured movie, The Exorcist III—also known as Legion. Directed by William Peter Blatty, who also wrote the original Exorcist, this film ignores The Exorcist II: The Heretic entirely and serves as a direct sequel to the first movie. The studio, of course, insisted on calling it The Exorcist III to capitalize on the original’s fame. Blatty wanted the film to focus more on psychological horror rather than the supernatural spectacle, but the studio had other ideas and forced him to tack on a traditional exorcism scene. Despite that, it still manages to be unsettling in its own right.

What makes The Exorcist III fascinating is its blend of horror and mystery. George C. Scott plays Detective Kinderman, investigating a series of gruesome murders that seem connected to the events of the original film. The performances, particularly by Brad Dourif as the Gemini Killer and Jason Miller (who returns as the tormented priest from the first movie), are compelling. The film’s themes explore possession, the nature of evil, and how the past can haunt you—literally.

While I appreciate the unique approach, the movie ultimately gets a “binge-never” from me. It drags, and the forced exorcism scene feels like it was stapled on just to meet genre expectations. Still, if you’re a fan of the original Exorcist, it’s worth a watch just to see where the story goes. But for those who want something more gripping, I recommend checking out Angel Heart, End of Days, or Deliver Us From Evil. They’re all police procedural with a supernatural twist, exploring the battle between detectives and the ultimate evil.

And now, for a quick bit of trivia: did you know that The Exorcist III features cameos from Samuel L. Jackson, Fabio, and even NBA legend Patrick Ewing? They all appear in a surreal dream sequence that’s both disturbing and oddly mesmerizing.

Before I wrap up, let’s talk about staff picks. You know what’s been on my mind lately? How Jim from The Office is kind of a sociopath. And if you think he’s bad, Tim from the original UK version is even worse. But we can save that deep dive for another episode.

In closing, if you’re still craving something spooky after The Exorcist III, stick around because we’ve got more summer slasher flicks coming your way. Thanks for tuning in, and as always, binge if you dare.

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